For further information, consult God. --Ashleigh Brilliant

Wednesday, April 30, 2003

It's raining, it's pouring, the old man is snoring.

Since it's raining outside, I can't send the kids outside to play and my sister is out of town again this week so I have all four, so I think we are going to make some dough shapes.
2 cups of flour
1 cup salt
enough water to make dough consistency
food coloring or paint (optional)
Use cookie cutter to cut out shapes, or do some free forms. Bake in 200 degree oven about one hour. Let cool. If you didn't use food coloring, once cooled you can paint your shapes. You can also use shiny spray stuff (any kind, any brand) for a shiny finish if desired.
If one of use comes up with a pretty nifty piece, we stick a magnet (find in any craft store) on the back and put on the fridge. Also makes great "grandma" or "auntie" gifts.
I got these from Wednesday What If

1. What if you were offered the chance to travel back in time to stop yourself from doing something really stupid that you now regret having done?
I would do it in a heartbeat. There is one thing that I am completely ashamed of doing. I have made peace with my actions long ago, but I regret the effect it may have had on the other individuals involved. It is the one secret I will carry with my to the grave.

2. What if you could travel forward in time to see what the "you" of the future is like?
Nah, I really don't have much interest in doing this one. I'm too busy with things as they currently are and I think it would make the journey getting there boring.

3. What if you could travel back in time to change one world event?
I don't think I would do this either. Every thing that has happened, good or bad, has led to where I am right now. If I hadn't lost the first love of my life, I wouldn't have met the second. Even tragic events like the loss of my mother. If she were still alive, I am pretty sure I wouldn't have moved and how else would I have met my kid's father? Who wants to chose between their mother or their kids?

4. What if you could choose to relive a single day in your life over and over again, as much or as little as you want -- what day would it be?
When I read this question, the only thing that comes to mind is B.B. King. ("The thrill is gone...")

5. What if you were offered the chance to travel forward in time and see your death -- the date, time, and cause?
Absolutely not. I would obsess over the day, go into Buffy mode and try to plot a way to foil destiny and we all know this ain't no TV show. I want to continue living as if today just might be the last. I imagine one would get lazy. "I'll take that cruise next year, after all, I have 50 years, 7 months and 18 days before I die. Plenty of time. Now shut-up, Law & Order's back on."

Tuesday, April 29, 2003

Is it the end of the world as we know it?

I watched a show last night on Travel Channel about millionaire trailor parks. Get real. Exculsive communities in Aspen, CO and LA have trailor parks for rich folks, including a member of the rock band Chicago. The whole time I just kept saying, "You have got to be kidding me." Ritzy trailor trash. I want no part of it.
Should I be proud...or not?

I scored
on the classic 400 Point Purity Test!
Take the test here!
My blogger hasn't been filled with much content, but that's good. That means that I'm leading a busy life and I'm utililizing my paper journal, which I preper anyways. So I've been filling out a lot of questionaires, but who enjoys them more? The person who answered the questions or the person reading their answers? Doesn't matter, I will often be jogged of a memory and will pick up my pen afterwards. That's what important to me. I swiped this one off of small hands.

1. what facial feature do you find the most attractive on others?: Eyes, but please don't come at me with totally fucked up teeth.
2. would you vote for a woman candidate for president?: Most definitely. I believe it's about time
3. would you marry for money?:I would love to give an emphatic no, but when you're broke as I am at the moment it doesn't sound so bad
4. have you had braces?: No, but I should have. My front teeth are a bit crooked, but not totally fucked up thank goodness. Many people hardly notice.
5. do you pluck your eyebrows?:No, but I do sometimes get them "done"
6. do you ever cut or hurt yourself?: Not on purpose, I hav a very low tolerance for pain (how did I survive 2 natural childbirths I'll never know).
7. when was the last time you had a hickey?: Couldn't evne tell you. After college, I tried not to have any visible signs of recent lovemaking
8. could you live without a computer?: I lived before without one, it just wouldn't be as fun
9. do you use icq, aol buddy list, etc.?: Nope, never have either
10. if so, how many people are on your lists?: N/A
11. if you could live in any past time period, which would it be? I'm actually quite content right here.
12. do you drink enough water?: Ye Gads, no. I'm going to try to do better, I promise
13. do you wear shoes in the house or take them off?: That is one of the first things I do is remove my shoes.
14. what is your favorite fruit?: Apples
15. do you eat wheat bread or white?:Actually I like potatoe bread, but I grew up on wheat so I take that as an alternative
16. what is your favorite place to visit?:I haven't done nearly as much traveling as I would like. I would like to go back to NYC though
17. what is the last movie you saw?: Drumline. My sister brought the DVD. It was better than I expected, but LONG
18. do you kiss on the first date?: Sure, why not?
19. are you photogenic?: I've been told that I am, but I hate having my picture taken
20. do you dream in color or black and white?: I don't recall my dreams
21. are you wearing fingernail polish? Why, yes, I am
22. is it chipped or fresh?:Honey, I'm a nail tech, it must never be chipped.
23. do you have any dimples?:In my ass
24. do you remember being born?:Does anyone really?
25. why do you take surveys?: I think they're fun even if a bit egotistical
26. do you drink alcohol?Wine, coolers and champagne. All very rarely
27. did you like or do you like high school?I went to a very elite, rasict school, so no, I did not enjoy it very much.
28. what is the most beautiful language?: Italian and Swahili
29. when you are asleep do you like being kissed awake?:Depends on where they're doing the kissing
30. do you like sunrises or sunsets the most?: Sunsets
31. do you want to live to be 100?:Not really, I imagine it would be very lonely to lose so many friends, family, etc
32. do you think women should be expected to shave their body hair?: Goodness, no, or else I'd be breaking that rule on a regular basis
33. do you like salty food or sugary food the most?: Sugary
34. is a flat stomach important to you?: No, but I don't necessarily want to someone's fat ass stomach hanging out of their clothes
35. do you or have you played with a ouija board?: No, that shit freaks me out
36. are you loyal?: Yes, especially since I've learned that loyal does not equal stupid
37. are you tolerant of other peoples beliefs?: Yes, but I'm still pissed that my best friend married a Republican and is adopting many of his warped views. Shame on you, girl!
38. when you watch movies at home, do you like the lights on or off?: Doesn't really matter
39. do you believe in magic?: I believe we create our own magic
40. do you have nightmares frequently?:See # 20.
41. do you like your nose?: Yes, these are some interesting questions, aren't they?
42. do you like abstract art?:Yes
43. do you think you can draw well?: No one can beat my stick people
44. do you listen to music daily?: Yes, and right not I'm digging Floetry's joint
45. do you like to watch cartoons?:Love them
46. at what age did you find out that Santa Claus wasn't real?: I never believed in him
47. how many pairs of shoes do have in your closet?: About 5, the rest are in storage
48. do you like to wear the same shoes everyday or do you like a variety?: I wear whatever matches. I'm not a shoe gal
49. do you write poetry?: I used to, but I haven't in the past year or so
50. do you snore?: When I'm at my heavy weight I do
51. do you sleep more on your back, front, or sides?: Usually gripping the side of the bed because my kids are bed whores.
52. would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler?: I'm not a "gotta get home a feed the dog type person"
53. do you lick stamps? Does anyone anymore. I only see the self-adhesive kind when I go to the post office now
54. do you use an electric can opener?: Unfortunately my sister doesn't have one and mine is in storage in Virginia
55. have you ridden in a hot air balloon?: No, and I can't say I have much of a desire to either.
56. which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?: They both scab over eventually
57. do you think balding men should shave their heads?: If they want, I don't really care
58. do you know anyone who is clinically depressed?: Yes
59. do you prefer a piano or a violin?: piano
61. do you know someone who has cancer?: My best friend's mother in law has cancer, my sister is a breast cancer survivor, my uncle is also a cancer survivor.
64. do you like fast food joints, or expensive restaurants?: Either, I'm easy
65. would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum?: I don't have a preference here. I would greatly enjoy both
66. how many phones do you have in your house?: 3. One is a business line
67. how long is your hair?: Various lengths
68. do you get along with your parents?: My mother is deceased, but we did not get along. I have never had a relationship with the father
69. what color of eyes do you prefer?:This is another one of those don't care questions
70. what medications do you take? None if I can help it, but I do get headaches and migranes and sometimes have to take something for it
71. what does your bedroom look like? I recently moved back home so I'm staying with my sister, so my bedroom looks like her guest room

Monday, April 28, 2003

My favorite site this week is House Arrest, mostly because I think her denin tunic is cute and I want one, but also because I love the name Crafty Bitch. It's a moniker I've used in times past. Basically I've put Bitch on anything and used it, so that's not saying much for me.

Saturday, April 26, 2003

Often I will hear a song and it will so remind me of a particular person it's amazing. Every time I hear Staind's "It's Been Awhile" I think of D. At some point in our relationship all of the words to this song are a mirror of a conversation between us. I copied the lyrics directly from the CD liner, so the line breaks and all are Staind's not mine.

It's been awhile
Since I could hold my head high
Since I first saw you
Since I could stand on my own 2 feet again
Since I could call you
But everything I can't
Remember or fucked up as it
All may seem the consequences
That I've rendered I've stretched
Myself beyond my means
It's been awhile
Since I could say the I wasn't addicted
Since I could say I love myself as well
Since I've gone and fucked things
Up just like I always do
But all that shit seems to
Disappear when I'm with you
But everything I can't remember
As fucked up as it may seem
The consequences that I've rendered
I've gone and fucked up things again
Why must I feel this way
Just make it go away
Just one more peaceful day
It's been awhile
Since I could look at myself straight
Since I've said I'm sorry
Since I've seen the way
The candle lights your face
But I can still remember
Just the way you taste
But everything I can't remember as
Fucked up as it all may seem to be
I know it's me I cannot blame this on my
father he did the best he could for me
It's been awhile
Since I could hold my head up high
And it's been awhile since I said
I'm sorry

Friday, April 25, 2003

Here's my Friday Five (on time, imagine that!!!)
1. What was the last TV show you watched?
Buffy the Vampire Slayer (Angel's being a bad boy)
2. What was the last thing you complained about and what was the problem?
My sister bitching because she's stressed and taking it out on the family
3. Who was the last person you complimented and what did you say?
My daughter. I told her she was beautiful
4. What was the last thing you threw away?
My trash from lunch
5. What was the last website (besides this one) that you visited?

Tuesday, April 22, 2003

Lately me, my niece, nephew and daughter have been crazy Buffy fans. We rented the DVD of the first season from the library, and now we're watching the 2nd season on FX. Normally I would think this is the goofest show, and told my ex-roommate who was hooked so on a regular basis, but I was sitting in her room and saw the episode where Willow and Tara kissed and then Willow whacked out when Tara was killed and I've been hooked ever since. Now every single day at 6pm you will find me sitting in front of the boob tube getting my Buffy fix.

At least I'm not a candidate for clergy?

What's Your Spiritual Type?

You scored 69, on a scale of 25 to 100. Here's how to interpret your score:
25 - 29
Hardcore Skeptic -- but interested or you wouldn't be here!
30 - 39
Spiritual Dabbler -- Open to spiritual matters but far from impressed
40 - 49
Active Spiritual Seeker – Spiritual but turned off by organized religion
50 - 59
Spiritual Straddler – One foot in traditional religion, one foot in free-form spirituality
60 - 69
Old-fashioned Seeker -- Happy with my religion but searching for the right expression of it
70 - 79
Questioning Believer – You have doubts about the particulars but not the Big Stuff
80 - 89
Confident Believer – You have little doubt you’ve found the right path
90 - 100
Candidate for Clergy

Monday, April 21, 2003

1. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (100%)
2. Unitarian Universalism (93%)
3. Liberal Quakers (92%)
4. Orthodox Quaker (85%)
5. New Age (71%)
6. Reform Judaism (70%)
7. Neo-Pagan (67%)
8. Secular Humanism (61%)
9. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (60%)
10. Bahá'í Faith (57%)
11. Seventh Day Adventist (56%)
12. New Thought (56%)
13. Scientology (55%)
14. Hinduism (54%)
15. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (53%)
16. Mahayana Buddhism (52%)
17. Eastern Orthodox (51%)
18. Roman Catholic (51%)
19. Theravada Buddhism (50%)
20. Orthodox Judaism (50%)
21. Islam (45%)
22. Taoism (44%)
23. Sikhism (40%)
24. Nontheist (39%)
25. Jainism (38%)
26. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (28%)
27. Jehovah's Witness (20%)
I haven't heard from D. in about 2 weeks. I needlessly worry about him, I know, but knowing this one would think he would call to set my mind at ease. He can take care of himself, but I worry that he will do something to end up back in jail or prison. Or go back to his ex, which may be worse. I have no doubt being in that situation will drive him even farther into this self-destruct mode. Sometimes I'm amazed at how blind men can be. How easy they can be taken advantage of. She gave up parental rights to the kids, yet she's convinced him to send her $1000 for them. Give me a break. Since D. and I are no longer a couple, I can only give my opinion then shut up. I don't feel like I'm in a position where I can insist he not do it. I want him to move here with me because then I can have more influence over him. I believe that he should take care of his kids, however, that can be done without being taken advantage of. I suggested that he go shopping and buy them $800 worth of clothes and shoes and even toys if he want, then send that along with $200 to their grandmother who has custody. If he was here with me, I would take him shopping, make sure we went to different stores, and remove all of the tags. Women who take things from men who want to be fathers for their own benefit and not the benefit of the children piss me off. I say make it as hard for them as possible. If your child is wearing Payless shoes, you should be too.

Saturday, April 19, 2003

I hate feet anyways. So I would also beg women to take heed. I wouldn't be mad at a man in sandals to be kind as well.
I'm looking for some zines. If you (or anyone you know) puts out a zine. Please let me know. ebonyblue@mindless.com
I'm really into african-american stuff, but will read just about anything.
I've been to quite a few concerts in my day and the top ones are Prince (as he was called then), New Kids on the Block (you don't have to be a fan to enjoy the show), and Luther Vandross. I've seen Luther 3 times and loved him more with each show. He is amazing, his voice is amazing and I am a lifelong fan. Words can't even describe how I feel listening to his music. Tomorrow he will be 52, and unfortunately he is hospitalized after suffering a stroke. My prayers go out to him and his family.

Friday, April 18, 2003

Here's my Friday Five

1. Who is your favorite celebrity?
There's too many to name just one. Right now I'm digging Aaron Lewis of Staind and I always lust after Tyson Beckford. All time faves are Whoopi, Martin Sheen, Alice Walker, Maya Angelou, Sidney Poitier, Nelson Mandela and Jesus. This of course is assuming that the question means anyone famous not just actors or musicians.
2. Who is your least favorite?
Don't really have one.
3. Have you ever met or seen any celebrities in real life?
Ossie Davis was by far the coolest and most down to earth. He wouldn't even let me carry his bags. I've also met Maya Angelou, Alice from Brady Bunch, LTD (does anyone even remember them?), Robbie Benson, Buster Douglas (I was a bit tipsy and told him Mike Tyson was going to kick his ass), New Kids on the Block (fan or not, still one of the best concerts I've every been to) and more that I can't think of off the top of my head.
4. Would you want to be famous? Why or why not?
I wouldn't mind to be well-known. But more of a Nikki Giovanni known, not a can't even go to the grocery store without being mobbed famous.
5. If you had to trade places with a celebrity for a day, who would you choose and why?
Maya Angelou just so that I can experience what it's like to be a literary genius.

Tuesday, April 15, 2003

I have been so busy. I've been running all day long, but at the end of the day when I'm laying in bed reveiwing the day I feel as if I got nothing accomplished. I hate being stressed. I hate D for making me stressed. No, that's not true. I love D or else I wouldn't be stressed, right? We both need your prayers to get us through this time.
On a happier note, my son turned 1 last week!! He is such a little man and I couldn't love him more if I tried. The cookout we had was really nice. Lots of laughs and good times. Jamie is going to look at my computer so I won't have to beat myself up for not getting to the library to check my email, update my blog, etc. It really sucks not having a computer at home, especially since my sister's been out of town and I've been keeping the kids. Every time she goes out of town and I'm stuck watching 4 kids 24/7, I remember why I never wanted a large family.
Oh God, I can't wait...


Monday, April 07, 2003

Had a busy weekend and I'm just now getting to my Friday Five.
1. How many houses/apartments have you lived in throughout your life?
17. I think I was a gypsy in a past life.
2. Which was your favorite and why?
The Hostel because living and working there I literally got to meet people from all around the world and live my international travel fantasies through stories of their homes. I also met my lifelong friend, Alina, the Aussie hottie. Plus I had the biggest room in the house.
3. Do you find moving house more exciting or stressful? Why?
I get a rush out of it. My mother was kidnapped by gypsies when she was a kid, I think destiny got mixed up. They should have gotten me because I LOVE to move. Absolutely love it.
4. What's more important, location or price?
Location is very important. I lived in a ratty, cheap flat and loved it and in a new 4 bedroom house and wasn't too keen with it. Being able to walk out my front door and see something is important, it's no fun always having to drive because everything is too far away & you're not on the bus line, etc.
5. What features does your dream house have (pool, spa bath, big yard, etc.)?
A pool/jacuzzi, huge yard with an awesome grill and my own little reading/writing room/office. No kids or significant others allowed.

Tuesday, April 01, 2003

Quote of the Month
"A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down."--Arnold H. Glasgow

Happy April!!!
National STDs Education and Awareness Month
National Poetry Month
Positive Parenting Month
Alcohol Awareness Month
Animal Cruelty Prevention Month
Cancer Control Month
Couple Appreciation Month
Holy Humor Month
National Child Abuse Prevention Month